It is with much sadness that I must report a rumor that has surfaced claiming that the NFL may be on the verge of losing yet another one of its longtime greats. As a Bears fan it was particularly hard to write about Brian Urlacher’s retirement last week but the possibility of Tim “The Toolman” Tebow calling it quits after such a storied career has touched an entirely different nerve inside me.
At this point Tebow’s pass still has a chance of being completed
It isn’t that I’m necessarily a fan of Tim “I Invented Tebow-ing” Tebow but having watched him play on one occasion I know that the NFL will never see another QB quite like him. This may sound overly dramatic but if you’ve seen the way Tim “Can’t-I-Just-Run-the-Ball-Instead-of-Throwing-it?” Tebow threw such razor-sharp passes to a spot where no one could possibly catch the ball then you know what I mean. If you’ve seen Tim “I’m-Really-Good-in-the-Fourth-Quarter-Because-the-Defense-Is-Winded-From-Laughing-So-Hard-at-All-of-the-Passes-I’ve-Thrown-in-the-First-Three-Quarters” Tebow sacrifice his body in order to make room for Mark Sanchez on the bench then you know what I mean. If you’ve ever seen Tim “Rex-Grossman-is-Still-Playing-but-I-Can’t-Get-a-Job-on-a-Team’s-Practice-Squad?” Tebow rush up the middle for a half-a-yard three times in a row because his coach didn’t want him to throw the ball then you know what I mean.
I feel confident in standing with the billions of Tebow-ites around the world in saying that if this rumor is true the NFL will sorely miss seeing the greatest quarterback ever named Tim Tebow playing on Sundays (Or Thursday, Saturday & Monday for that matter).
“This is how much better my career has been than Tim’s”
Tebow inconsolable when the realization hits him that Rex Grossman had a better career than he did
Accounting 4 Life 
Not exactly sure here, but I think I’m gettin’ that you’re down on the Tebow. But look, he’s so pretty!
I try to pick on Rex Grossman and Tim Tebow in equal parts but at times my proportions get a little out of whack.
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Cheers!